What I Might Have Done

What I Might Have Done
Is a poison of uncertainty
seeping through my mind.
What if, what if…
Would I be happier,
Would I be more alive?

Would that man
Have lived a while longer
Had I been there
By his side that night
Would he have a job,
A family,
A home instead of a tomb?

Would I have gone crazy
Or would I have gone sane
If once upon a time
I had done this – not that.

Am I living the wrong life right now,
Or the right one?
Is there a difference?
Am I myself,
Or did my self diverge from me
A long while back
In a yellow wood…

The poison penetrates deeply sometimes
But eventually
I awaken
To the universe in which I live
Whether I will or no.

And feeling the matrix
Into which I was born
And to which I belong –
I know that What I Might Have Done
Is a poison,
And what I am choosing to do right now
Is life.
And that is the way it ought to be.

© Samuel Birrer and Serendipity, 2016.


About SamBirrer

Chemistry student and undergrad researcher at Rutgers University. Minors in math and geology. President of Rutgers Chemistry Society (student chapter of ACS).
This entry was posted in Free Verse, Poetry and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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